How to Tap Into Your Resiliency (And Why You Should)
Resiliency is about your comeback rate.
It’s not about never getting knocked down, or dropping into fear, or letting your ego drive the car. It’s about how fast you can come back: to joy, to love, to trust, to who you really are.
Because we’re all humans, and life can be really messy. Sometimes things happen to us, sometimes we hurt people, and sometimes we forget our divine nature.
That’s where resiliency comes in. Resiliency is here to bring you back to trust when bad situations happen, to bring you back to love when fear starts to take over—even stronger and wiser than before, with an even deeper and more meaningful connection with yourself.
You may have heard before that you can only go into joy and pleasure as deep as you’ve gone into your pain. This is a necessary part of living and an important part of your spiritual practice. But that doesn’t mean you have to or even can live there.
Think of the moment you connect with your resiliency and come back to joy as the Temperance card in the tarot. You’ve been through death, but you’ve come through it into the magic of rebirth, of stillness, of calm. There are still more challenges ahead (the Devil card is next) but you can know that and still be in a place of Temperance.
Scroll down to get some tips to help you tap into your own resiliency and strengthen that connection.
Lean on your community.
You don’t have to do it alone. Who are the people you trust to tell it like it is, lifts you up, and not judge you? Whether it’s your mom, a close friend, or your sister, don’t be afraid to call on that person or those people to help you when you need it.
Look for the lesson or greater meaning.
You don’t have to believe that everything happens for a reason. But look for the greater meaning or lesson in whatever it is you’re going through— and if you can’t see it yourself, ask your community to help you find it.
I find that the tarot is an incredible tool for this. Each card of the Major Arcana is a step on the journey to the World, a card of wholeness and joy.
Try laying out each of the Major Arcana cards in front of you and asking yourself which card you’re in.
Are you dealing with a shedding of your former self, of parts of your life? Maybe you’re in Death.
Are past hurts keeping you in fear? Maybe you’re in the Fool reversed.
Each card can help you realize which lesson you’re learning right now. Once you pick your card, look at its place in the journey. See the greater context of where you’re heading—to the vibrant energy of the Sun, to the wild juicy feminine of the Moon, to the wholeness of the World.
Why do you do what you do in the world?
Whatever your greater purpose is, connect with that and remember that you are on this planet for a reason. You are here to bring forth what only you can bring forth, and the world needs.
So rest, feel your feelings, go through what you’re going through, and know that ultimately you will get through it because you are here to fulfill your greater purpose.
Connect with your intuition.
Is this ever not the answer? Connecting with your intuition can help you see the greater meaning in what you’re going through. It can help you know when you need to reach out for support and who to reach out to. It can help you know the best path to take forward.
If you’re feeling blocked, one simple thing you might like to do is ask your oracle or tarot cards, “What message does my intuition have for me right now?”
Get more tips to connect with your intuition in this post.
Find what makes you feel good.
When you feel stressed, upset, or you’re going through a difficult time, what are some simple things that help you feel better? Think about what they are for you (use the list below to spark your creativity) and write them down on a piece of paper that you can return to when things aren’t easy. Some ideas are:
Dancing
Doing yoga
Rubbing your feet with oils
FaceTiming that friend or family member who always knows what to say
Reading your favorite book
Spending more time alone
Spending more time with people you care about
Taking a walk
Playing a singing bowl
Listening to an inspiring podcast
Eating your favorite meal
Being held
Drinking a cup of tea
Receiving energy healing
Journaling
This is going to be super unique for everyone, so think about what it is for you!
Move your body.
You’ve probably heard a yoga teacher talk about how what you do on your mat is a mirror for life: what you do when it gets hard, how you talk to yourself, how you move through transitions.
It turns out, even science knows that’s true. The researchers who wrote the book Resilience: The Science of Mastering Life's Greatest Challenges actually found that the most resilient people in their studies had exercised regularly.
It turns out, that the stress of exercise helps us adapt to the stress of life challenges. So however you like to move, whether it’s yoga, running, weightlifting, dancing, jumping rope, or something else, try to make it a regular part of your life. It will actually help you be more resilient!
